I'M A STAR - PEARL 2022

 NO, IM A STAR

By: NPCLena

We all have heard of Pearl by now. If you haven't I recommend that you watch it. It is about a young girl who aspires to a different life than she is living. The means to do it is to become a pornstar. Now it is classified as a slasher/horror movie. It came out around Halloween. It took me a long time to watch but now that I a sitting here thinking about what I want to be, or who I aspire to be, I realize that I do want to become a star. And not so Hollywood type. 

Recently I was recommended a book called Atomic Habits by James Clear. It is really neatly written and goes into detail about how small changes in your life can become habits that you carry on for a lifetime. Obviously, we are talking of habits that will have a positive outlook on your life. I want a positive outlook on life. I have been depressed for about 3 years now. Even before the pandemic. I use to have healthy habits that showed through my school performance, through my body - I ate healthy and made sure to do pilates/yoga everyday. I even read which is a non existent hobby I have these days. But I was depressed. I was working through some repressed trauma and I did not know how to go through life. Fast forward to the pandemic and here I am. I am a freshman in college, and I am suppose to make a decision about where I will be maybe ten to twenty years from now. Who do I want to be?  What is my chosen Identity? How can I create habits that align with the person I want to become? These are questions posed in Atomic Habits. And I want to become a star. I want a better life than what I am living now. Someone who is financially free and is able to use her mind to her fullest. 

Why I Started

I create NPCblogs because for so long I felt like a Non Player Character. It is really fitting in my opinion. And this is not really a bad thing at all. Non Player Characters get to live their life without the entire judgement of the world, no pressure, just vibes. 

Starting this blog, i want to make clear that this is a safe space. I just want people to feel like the they aren't living in some sort of tunnel vision. 

This is my very first blog post.I hope you enjoyed it. There will be more topics I will be posting. Right now I do not have a posting schedule, but I promise to be consistent. 

Signing off, 

NPCLena